Alice Miller

Abuse Support Bibliography
Shame Malama Project NoSpank
Therapy Encouragement Rights
The Natural Child Alice Miller Library Book reviews
A letter from Alice Miller (Feb 2000)
The Childhood Trauma (1998)

Alice Miller's website....... Her books......

Emotional Intelligence

 

1. On Abuse

In her book "Banished Knowledge: Facing childhood injuries," Alice Miller states: "Any person who abuses his children has himself been severely traumatized in his childhood in some form or another. This statement applies without exception since it is absolutely impossible for someone who has grown up in an environment of honesty, respect, and affection ever to feel driven to torment a weaker person in such a way as to inflict lifelong damage. He has learned very early on that it is right and proper to provide the small, helpless creature with protection and guidance; this knowledge, stored at that early age in his mind and body, will remain effective for the rest of his life."

(New York: Anchor Books © 1990. page 190.)

In "For Your Own Good: Hidden cruelty in child-rearing and the roots of violence," she talks about the prevailing abusive child-rearing practices we have grown accustomed to. An abused child does not know it is being abused, and in order to survive and avoid the unbearable pain, the mind is provided with a remarkable mechanism, the "gift" of "repression," which stores these experiences in a place outside of consciousness, as she elaborates in her book "The Drama of the Gifted Child." There is double meaning here, for gifted children are often the products of abuse, with one flaw - if the overriding need for admiration - for their looks, brilliance, or achievements is not met, then there is severe depression. For example, read: Ryan, Joan (1995): "Little girls in pretty boxes: the making and breaking of elite gymnasts and figure skaters, " New York: Doubleday. Miller says one can only be free from depression "when self-esteem is based on the authenticity of one's own feelings and not on the possession of certain qualities."

2. Support

Children need a great deal of both emotional and physical support from the adult. According to Alice Miller, this adult support must include the following elements in order for a child to develop to his or her full potential:

 
"1. Respect for the child
 2. Respect for his rights
 3. Tolerance for his feelings
 4. Willingness to learn from his behavior:
     a. About the nature of the individual child
     b. About the child in the parent themselves
     c. About the nature of emotional life, which can be
 observed much more clearly in the child than in the
 adult because the child can experience his feelings much
 more intensely and, optimally, more undisquisedly than
 an adult."

Quoted from: Miller, Alice. "For your own good : hidden cruelty in child-rearing and the roots of violence," New York : Farrar, Straus, Giroux, © 1983, page 100.

3. Bibliography

The works of Alice Miller have now been translated into more than 21 different languages. A search of the Library of Congress reveals the following:

1. 94-8333: Miller, Alice.  The drama of the gifted child : the search for the  true self /  Completely rev. and updated / with a new introduction by the
     author.  New York : BasicBooks, c1994.  viii, 150 p. ; 21 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: RC569.5.C55 M55313 1994
2. 93-27922: Miller, Alice.  Breaking down the wall of silence : the
     liberating experience of facing painful truth /  New York : Meridian,
     1993.  ix, 192 p. ; 21 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: RC569.5.C55 M5513 1993
3. 92-111941: Miller, Alice.  Breaking down the wall of silence : to join the
     waiting child /  London : Virago Press, 1991.  ix, 182 p. ; 25 cm.
4. 91-219126: Miller, Alice.  The untouched key : tracing childhood trauma in
     creativity and destructiveness /  1st Anchor Books ed.  New York : Anchor
     Books, Doubleday, 1991.  180 p. : ill. ; 22 cm.
     NOT IN LC COLLECTION
5. 91-148218: Miller, Alice.  The drama of the gifted child /  [New York] :
     BasicBooks, c1990.  xxi, 118 p. ; 21 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: RC553.N36 M5413 1990
6. 91-25348: Miller, Alice.  Breaking down the wall of silence : the
     liberating experience of facing painful truth /  New York, N.Y., U.S.A. :
     Dutton, c1991.  ix, 181 p. ; 23 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: RC569.5.C55 M55 1991
7. 90-3081: Miller, Alice.  Banished knowledge : facing childhood injuries /
     1st ed.  New York : Doubleday, c1990.  xi, 212 p. ; 22 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: BF721 .M539813 1990
8. 89-25623: Miller, Alice.  The untouched key : tracing childhood trauma in
     creativity and destructiveness /  1st ed. in the U.S.A.  New York :
     Doubleday, c1990.  viii, 180 p. : ill. ; 22 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: BF408 .M4913 1990
9. 88-187237: Miller, Alice.  Das verbannte Wissen /  2. Aufl.  Frankfurt am
     Main : Suhrkamp, 1988.  259 p. ; 20 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: BF721 .M5398 1988
10. 88-186241: Miller, Alice.  Der gemiedene Schlussel /  2. Aufl.  Frankfurt
     am Main : Suhrkamp, 1988.  191 p. : ill., ports. ; 20 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: BF721 .M5397 1988
11. 87-143548: Miller, Alice.  The drama of being a child and the search for
     the true self /  London : Virago, 1987, 1988 printing.  156 p. ; 20 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: RC553.N36 M5413 1987
12. 86-875014: Miller, Alice.  Das Drama des begabten Kindes und die Suche
     nach dem wahren Selbst /  1. Aufl.  Frankfurt am Main : Suhrkamp, 1979.
     181 p. ; 20 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: MLCS 86/3669 (R)
13. 86-4454: Miller, Alice.  Pictures of a childhood : sixty-six water colors
     and an essay /  1st ed.  New York : Farrar, Straus & Giroux, 1986.  161
     p. : ill. (some col.) ; 23 x 24 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: ND1954.M55 A2 1986
14. 85-32084: Miller, Alice.  Thou shalt not be aware : society's betrayal of
     the child /  New York : Meridian books, 1986.  p. cm.
15. 84-672871: Miller, Alice.  The drama of the gifted child and the search
     for the true self /  London ; Boston : Faber and Faber, 1983.  152 p. ;
     21 cm.
16. 84-6008: Miller, Alice.  Thou shalt not be aware : society's betrayal of
     the child /  American ed.  New York : Farrar, Straus, Giroux, 1984.
     viii, 331 p. ; 24 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: RC506 .M5213 1984
17. 82-24249: Miller, Alice.  For your own good : hidden cruelty in
     child-rearing and the roots of violence /  New York : Farrar, Straus,
     Giroux, c1983.  xvii, 284 p. ; 24 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: HQ769 .M531613 1983 
18. 81-188692: Miller, Alice.  Am Anfang war Erziehung /  Frankfurt am Main :
     Suhrkamp, 1981, c1980.  321, [1] p. ; 19 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: BF721 .M5396 1980
19. 80-50535: Miller, Alice.  Prisoners of childhood /  New York : Basic Books,
     c1981.  x, 118 p. ; 22 cm.
     LC CALL NUMBER: RC553.N36 M5413

Last updated 1 May 2005

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